It's been a while since I've posted a work story, so here's one that's been bugging me for a while. I have this conversation on a regular basis.

Customer: Can you unlock me please?
Me: (checks) Your account is not locked.
C: But it says it is.
M: What does it say on your screen right now?
D: It says "the workstation is in use and has been locked".
M: Okay, so the workstation is locked, not your account. You just need to type your password to unlock it.
C: It doesn't let me.
M: What error message do you get?
C: It says "Your password has expired. Please change the password at another machine and try again."
M: Okay, well you should change your password at another machine and try again.
C: Oh, is that what I need to do?
M: Yes.
C: Okay, thanks. Bye.
M: *headdesk*

Oh, for the record, the phrase "My computer won't let me do x" is my most hated phrase. I have images of a robotic hand emerging from the machine and taking the mouse away.

I swear they coordinate with each other.

Monday morning, end of school holidays, everyone back from the snow
(should have seen the Monaro Highway last night) - I always knew it was
going to be a hell day. But this is ridiculous.

We just had a full five minutes, 10:55 - 11:00 with absolutely no calls
arriving. Then suddenly, three calls within the space of two seconds.
These were answered, another two calls came in, another couple... Then
nothing. It's now 11:15 and the queue is empty again.

In about five minutes I expect the next wave will arrive.

I think they do it deliberately. You see, if we fail our Service Level
Agreement, then the department receives service credits. In other words,
they don't pay as much. It is in the department's financial best
interests to make sure we do not provide the service we have contracted
for.

Last month we met every single one of our service levels. For the first
time since this company began providing IT service, the department had
no service credits. I think they were a little surprised at this, and
perhaps weren't expecting it. So their tactic now is to ensure we fail
the service level and have to give them service credit so that it
doesn't cost the company as much money.

Cynical, much?

Email post from Arthwollipot
http://www.arthwollipot.com/
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